Herman Smirch

Comics continued to be published while the animated series ran, including many under the Nintendo Comics System label by Valiant Comics. One of the most unique of these was another based on Super Mario Land, set in the real world where a selfish man’s dark heart acted as a gateway to free Tatanga and his forces from the world inside the video game.

This evil man was Herman Smirch, a video game store employee who spent every minute of his time complaining about how the world owed him, and frequently shoplifted from his own store. Though initially dragged into Tatanga’s schemes against his own free will, and frequently tried to flee and pass his Game Boy onto other unsuspecting victims around him, he eventually declared his allegiance to Tatanga and became his faithful follower in his schemes to conquer both worlds.

As a fighter, he won’t have much going for him attribute-wise, lacking in strength, speed, or any kind of defense, his only major advantage being his large size. His moveset will pull from his trilogy of comics, both the video game releasing various Super Mario Land minions into the world, as well as his occasional actions to help out or flee.

Likelihood rating: Non-game

Mario Multimedia Roster, Updated

SUPER SMASH BROS. UNIVERSE

SUPER MARIO MULTIMEDIA

And now, we have three major characters appearing in western comics to add:

1. Film Mario

1a. Film Luigi

2.     TV Mario

2a.     TV Luigi

3. Mario-Kun

4.     Tommy Treehugger & Co-MC

4a.     Evil Eric & Tammy Treehugger

5. Film Daisy

6. Princess Toadstool

7. Tomboy Peach

8. Mechakuribo

9. Mushroom King

10.  TV Toad

11. Prince Haru

12.  Bones Bailey

13.  Oogtar

14. President Koopa

15.  King Koopa

16.  Robo Koopa

17.  TV Koopalings

18.  Wizenheimer

19. Herman Smirch

20.  Clovis

21.  Barney Todd

22.  Master Brian

23.  Kid Dynamo

24.  Dr. Demise

25.  Gorilla Ghost

26. Big Bertha

27.  Mervin the Magician

28.  Genie

29. Brutius Maximus Grouchimus

30.  Captain Clump

31.  Bunsen

32.  Hercufleas

33.  Salvador Drainado

34.  Sergeant Kooperman

35.  Flab Boys

36.  James Blonde

37.  Vampa White

38.  Zero

39.  Captain Abidab

40.  Mugga the Medicine Woman

41.  Misaki

42.  Waldo the Wizard

43.  Quirks

44.  Queen Mushroomkhamen

45.  Wizard King of the West

46.  Junior

47.  Mighty Plumber

48.  Crime Wave Clyde

49.  Dino Riders

50. Dirk Drain-Head

51. Film Goomba

Thanks for reading! Now, let's cover our Mario-based books, starting with Mario and the Incredible Rescue!

Character Sheet: Herman Smirch

HERMAN SMIRCH

Now that we're finished with the western comics of the Mario series, let's go through and cover our assorted newcomers. We have four this time, one appearing in the regular Mario roster, the other three in the multimedia roster. They are:

1. Pionpi

2. Mushroom King

3. Herman Smirch

4. Dirk Drain-Head

Today, let's cover a weird little corner of the Mario series with Herman Smirch. Herman Smirch is a regular human from the real world who works minimum wage at a video game store. His dark and selfish heart allowed him to be used as a conduit for Tatanga and his forces to be released from the Game Boy he stole from the store. He would go on to be a hapless stooge for Tatanga's schemes, trying to escape them at first, but eventually pledging his loyalty to the alien to help him conquer the rest of the world.

He doesn't do that much throughout the series, but just enough to get by with a moveset. First of all is the game boy he stole that acts as a portal between the real world and the video game world. He also has a flying car souped up by his video game allies, and he generally tends to pull off cowardly strikes typically in an attempt to get himself out of trouble.

Here's the moveset I came up with:

Standard B: Game Boy

He will hold out the Game Boy portal he stole, the face glowing and producing one of an assortment of enemies from Super Mario Land, shrunken down to miniature size, which will then attack.

Side B: Cookie Sheet

One lucky strike he got off on Mario during the series came in the first volume, when Mario was about to charge Tatanga only for Smirch to strike him with a cookie sheet and send him flying. This will act as a deflector move for projectiles.

Up B: Flying Car

His car will appear around him and lurch upward into the sky with a rev and a screech, smacking into opponents with the force of, well, a car. He will drop out of it after a short distance.

Down B: Game Return

This will be the reverse of his Standard B, with him holding up the Game Boy and having it trap any character or item become trapped inside it for a short time.

Final Smash: Armies of Tatanga

Basically identical to Pionpi's, except his looks a bit less intentional, with the Game Boy simply springing to life in his hand and making him stumble backwards as it releases the flood of enemies.

Entrance: He will saunter on, looking put out that someone actually expected him to be here at all.

Taunts: Up, he will rub the back of his neck in frustration. Side, he will look over the Game Boy in his hand, trying to figure out how to play it. Down, he will stuff the Game Boy inside his coat and look around suspiciously.

Thanks for reading! Next, we'll finish off with Mario's plumbing hero (his third), Dirk Drain-Head!

The Herman Smirch Trilogy

THE HERMAN SMIRCH TRILOGY

The Herman Smirch trilogy is a threesome of comics released by Valiant Comics, technically as part of the Nintendo Comics System but also with its own world and continuity. They include the issues "In the Palm of Your Hand . . .", "It's a Small World After All", and "Team Play." They are set in the real world, where Mario is simply a fictional video game character, and loosely center on a man named Herman Smirch.

Herman Smirch is a selfish, arrogant man who works in a video game store and regularly shoplifts the games he sells. Because of his twisted and self-serving spirit, Tatanga from the game Super Mario Land manages to open a portal between the Mario world and the real world using a Game Boy he stole, unleashing his armies into the real world to take it over. The first issue then follows two children who figure out how to summon Mario from the game so that he can defeat Tatanga and put him back in the game.

The next two issues follow Herman Smirch once again coming into contact with a Game Boy and being once again used as a conduit to release Tatanga into the real world once again, Smirch being forced to act as his henchmen and new children and "good" adults having to summon Mario to defeat him.

Obviously, Smirch is our first option for a potential character. Though he is a regular human, the stolen Game Boy releasing enemies from Super Mario Land certainly gives us some stuff to work with, as does the actions he is forced to take both in servitude to Tatanga and while trying to avoid getting roped into the schemes. I should also note that this does give us some material to work with for Tatanga as well, and the enemy character Pionpi is given a bit of an upgrade as Tatanga's right-hand man, even acting as the main villain in "Team Play." He regularly rides around on a Yurarin and seems to be in full command of all the various enemies, with Tatanga letting him lead the troops.

Here's what we've got so far:

Characters:

Mario

Link

Kirby

Luigi

Princess Peach

Toad

Yoshi

Bowser

Tatanga

Koopalings

Herman Smirch: Game Boy, gun, hijack, flying car, Tatanga's minions

Mushroom King: go-kart, portable throne, magic wand, dog, chameleon, "Sacred Cylinder of Cheese," Green Gecko Gem, garden, mattress of clouds, Wooster, Stopwatch

Dirk Drain-Head: wrench, plunger, cape, Snakey, Pipe Ooze, Muck

Pionpi: Yurarin, spell, minions

Stanley the Talking Fish

Friendly Floyd: salesman, items

Stages:

Super Mario World locations

Nintendo Hotel

Real World locations (Disneyland being one of them)

Thanks for reading! Next up, we have two Mario vs. Wario comics to cover!